Monday, April 24, 2017

Believing.. to Knowing..

Would you ever say "I believe that there is air around me"? It would sound really stupid, isn’t it? You know that there is air on this planet, all around you. You can feel it even if you can’t see it. What is the need for 'believing' in something which you know already exists? That explains the difference between believing and knowing.

When we keep saying that we are a strong believer of God, or that we believe in something, raise a Question within - Do we really know, or are we trying hard to push something into us, which we find hard to accept? Are we conditioned to accept these beliefs without questioning, at the subconscious level?

Ms.Anita Moorjani, the author of the bestseller 
Dying to be Me
, talks about moving from a plane of Belief to a plane of Knowing.  Her life experience helped her to move into a state of Knowing - that even terminal illnesses like cancer cannot dominate over you if you don't allow it to! Isn't that a great feeling? -  to experience and know the Higher Power within us and around us, which is much more powerful than what we can otherwise perceive or comprehend?

Bible says: “For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.”
I kept wondering for many years.. mustard seed is so small.. isn't my belief even that big? What did Jesus actually mean when he said this? I got my answer from one of my friends few years back - Examine a mustard seed - it has a thin skin covering it. The mustard seed occupies the entire space within its outer cover, that it is almost impossible to separate it out. Well, that explains it! What Jesus meant was actually the completeness of our belief. If we totally believe in something, without even a tiny fraction of doubt, nothing is impossible for us.

Our mind is a powerful resource available at our disposal. More than often, we become a slave of it, even without being aware of it. When the mind gets into an autopilot mode, it is very powerful, and can drive us crazy - making us live in the past, and making us fear the future. Get into the driver seat and switch off the autopilot. Let us make ourselves some free space within us, and remove all the clutter, so that we can make it work to our advantage. The journey from 'believing' to 'knowing' can start only then!
Miracles happen in life, only if we allow them to. In fact, if our mind is able to comprehend an idea, it is no longer a miracle. Few hundred years back, electricity (and its current applications) was a miracle that majority of the population may have found difficult to comprehend. Yet, someone in the crowd knew that it was possible, conceived and processed it in their mind, and finally materialized it into the physical world. It is no longer a miracle to the mankind, but just another phenomenon based on the laws of physics.
Healing our physical bodies using the knowledge that each of us are much beyond the physical bodies, and that healing within(mind/subconscious) leads to healing without (the physical body), again is perceived as a miracle now. It may not be too far into the future, where this might also become just a normal phenomenon. This however needs our consciousness to move into the state of knowing that such a healing is possible, even without the support of medications. And with more such miracles happening, it will slowly stop being a miracle.
One of the easiest manifestation of thoughts that I have experienced is through ‘pimples’ on my face. Whenever I think about pimples, I almost always end up having them on my face the next morning! Since they are considered unclean/anti-beauty elements on the face, I too carry many of those pimple/scar removing face creams with me. However, on few occasions, I have taken the action of not applying the cream on my pimples, knowing that I have the healing power within me. And whenever that action-cum-belief was because of ‘knowing’, I have experienced complete healing – the next day, the pimple vanished. But whenever I was trying hard to push that belief into me, it hasn’t worked, even though there was an associated action of not applying the cream.
The knowing matters, and just believing doesn’t get us too far. And whenever an action was taken with definite knowledge of the result, miracles have always happened!

Friday, February 24, 2017

Gratitude - the Ultimate therapy

Let us monitor the thoughts that pre-occupy our mind most of our waking hours. What sort of thoughts dominate our minds all day? Thoughts related to the differences we have with the people around us, I would say! Be it personal or professional. Or, there could be worries related to the imaginary situations that we create for ourselves (Instead, shouldn't this creativity be used on something more productive?). We often think that the people around us are our enemies, always trying to hurt us, or waiting to take advantage of us in all possible ways. We feel no one can be trusted - maybe it is a learning from our past experiences. We think we need to keep ourselves armed (mentally, more than physically), ready to defend the behaviors and verbal attacks coming from the people around us. Within our homes, we feel our spouses are being too mean, parents and in-laws do not even treat us as humans, our children do not give us the respect we deserve after all the pains we have taken in bringing them up. At work it is even more challenging, with our bosses trying to squeeze out every bit out from us, and the peers trying to stab at our back if we are not alert.

In the mist of all these thoughts, how do we find peace? How do we live a satisfying life? The mentally ill people who we see on the roads, blabbering things - how different are we to them? Only that they tell out things innocently, but we have to silently suffer all these thoughts going on within us! How can we even relax for a few minutes? Our mind keeps pouring in with all the suggestions which is perceived to help us. Some of these suggestions we think are very comforting, giving us satisfaction at the possibility of getting a score over our 'enemies'. We feel elated for a few minutes devouring pleasure from these scoring thoughts, but that is all what it lasts for. The endless loop of worries and anxiety still continues, and we feel drained out by the end of the day, not even getting a peaceful sleep at the end of it all.

How can we put an end to these endless cycle of worries that we have to go through every day? The numerous experiences I have gained from my life have taught me that Gratitude and Love are the sure-shot magic bullets that can take out all our worries. In fact both gratitude and love originate from the same feeling; they are inseparable. For each and every worry that we have, the prescription is to identify and invoke a feeling of Gratitude and Love that can free us from this worry!

Whenever we catch ourselves worrying about something (yes, we need to be alert and check what is going on in there as frequent as possible!), stop for a moment. My secret weapon to stop my thoughts has always been the Question - "So What?". This really helps me to anchor myself back in the present - take me away from the past and future. The present moment has the power to stop our endless worries. Take a moment to look at the beautiful things around us. Aren’t they all perfect? - the trees, the clouds, the wind that is gently soothing us. Being at that place to enjoy the beauty around us is truly a great blessing, isn't it? Be grateful for the good things we are in possession at this moment. Whatever we are worrying about is just a possibility. Why don't we deal with it when it is required? Believe and know that we will be equipped the best way to deal with the problems at the right moment.

What about the people in our life? People's behavior are often situational, and is transaction based. One instance - maybe a behavior, or a word, need not define who the person actually is. Think about the stress that person maybe going through which made him/her react in the way that hurt us. What about the numerous instances which had earlier made us enjoy his/her company? Be grateful for those moments. Be willing to give people around us a ‘break’ that they deserve. Don't we also face such situations which make us go past our limits and hurt others?

Love and Gratitude will always come to our rescue, whenever we allow it to. It is the power we have within us, the one we can use to turn things around, in our favor, always at our disposal. We can be liberated from the un-necessary worries if we just decide to take help from these powerful feelings, that we already are in possession. There has not been a single exception when this hasn't worked – try it out for yourself. If the entire universe works on this principle, who are we to defy it?

Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Hard to stick to your Resolutions?

New Year has been the time to take new resolutions since ages. Seldom does all our enthusiasm and excitement last more than a few weeks though. As days pass, we regret having taken the resolutions and find many logical reasons why our resolution was not practical. We blame ourselves for having to go through the trauma of feeling guilty!

These two acts – 1) Not adhering to the resolution, which would have definitely helped us do better in life (of course, that is what resolutions are all about), and 2) regrets, guilty feeling and self-pity over not being able to meet them - has a double impact on our lives. We are depriving ourselves of something good in our life, and on top of it, we feel guilty that we cannot stick to our own resolutions. No resolutions is therefore, definitely better than breaking it after we take one.
How can we stick to these resolutions? Rephrasing it better, why should we stick to our resolutions?

Resolutions can stay longer only if we love ourselves. Love ourselves because God created us perfect. Whatever reasons we have now for not being able to love ourselves, we created them over our life time. Look for the perfections that we see in us. Thank the Creator for the blessings we have received with absolutely no effort or contribution from our side. List down the good things we know about our character, our physical wellness. There are multitudes of people around us who are suffering much more than us. Begin the year with heartfelt gratitude for the blessings we have taken for granted all these years. This love for our own self, this feeling of gratitude will definitely help us realize our own worth. This will help us realize the responsibility we have been given – responsibility of taking care of our body, our mind, our soul, our family, our relations, our finances and so on. Resolutions, hence will be more of a responsible behavior, and we will feel better being able to meet them day after day, week after week and so on. They become our second nature, just because we love ourselves!
What is the feeling we experience when we think about any resolution we have taken in the past? Is it something similar to the feeling when someone punishes us? Is it similar to being asked to do something that we don’t want to, and feel being forced into? Well, identifying the reason for your resolution, which is the love for yourself, or your loved ones will help us change this feeling. Love is capable of expelling all the negative feelings, and lifting us into a higher realm. Resolutions have to be associated with a feeling of love.

Imagine that we have taken a resolution of doing an activity, say, physical exercises, every day. What happens if we break the routine for a day or a week? Getting back into the routine is often the hardest part, harder than beginning the first time. We then get into the negative feeling of guilt and self-blame. Instead, just pat ourselves on the back and appreciate our dedication and commitment over the last few days or weeks. Accept that it is OK not being able to do what you actually wanted to do. You can always get back to your routine, just because you love doing it. There is no need for self-pity or guilty feeling. Revisit the ‘reasons’ for your resolution again and again, if you find psychological blocks within you. You deserve all the good things in life; nothing can stop you from who you want to be; no one else can decide for you. You are your own boss.
GO FOR IT!

Friday, December 30, 2016

Connections that Matter

"Life is like a Boomerang. Our thoughts, deeds and words return to us sooner or later with astounding accuracy" - Grant M Bright

The world is definitely changing. We see new born babies behaving much more advanced than the babies born a decade back. Their natural behavior itself has changed - and I am not referring to their acquired behavior. The frequency of negative news we see in the newspapers have gone up by leaps and bounds, and surprisingly, it is all following some pattern. The behavior of entire population is shifting in a different direction compared to 2-3 decades back. This may not be necessarily due to the advancements made in the field of science and technology. Have we not felt that the future may not be safe, the best for our children and grand-children? 

We live in a world where people they are a separate entity on their own. We often forget that we are all part of the Universal Consciousness, and we are all connected to each other. Each of us contribute to this consciousness through our thoughts, words and deeds, at the same time we take back a lot from it. We equally receive and contribute back to this consciousness, without much realization. Even though we don't realize it, we play a significant part in the shift of the consciousness, the way we are seeing it now. Being connected to each other also implies that when we try hurting our fellow beings, we are in turn hurting ourselves.

We often think that we can do anything, if no one else is watching us, don't we? Be it actions that will hurt the people around us, or anything that will not be accepted by others. The fact that we often ignore is that, we all have a part of God, or the Universal Consciousness within us. We cannot bypass the Consciousness within us, even for a second. Even our thoughts are naked - there is no way we can hide our thoughts from the Supreme power. We often think of God as a third party watching over our actions from a distance. And we hope that He will be busy with other things and will not notice the small wrongs that we do. But the fact is that God lives in us, and the moment we know that we are not right, He also knows! And that knowing matters. The moment we understand this aspect, we will think a second longer before we act. We will re-think if our prayers are done the right way. There is no way we can please God, as there is no  separate entity called God. God is inside us, and we are the best judge of our actions and thoughts.

The entire Universe operates by the principle of Law of Attraction - which means our thoughts and actions attract more similar situations. Our every thought, word or act will come back to us with exact precision and accuracy - the channels maybe different, and unpredictable, but it returns back with increased strength, surely within our present lifetime or the next. Sending out good thoughts, words and actions will thus ensure the same behavior from other people around us. This is the law by which the entire Universe operates, and there are no exceptions. However, if we know that someone has done a wrong to us, let us not hope and wait for them to face a negative situation and be happy about difficulties that may arise in their life. Letting Go is Magical, Forgiving and Forgetting is divine, and we are capable of doing that – just because we know that God lives in us!

Friday, December 16, 2016

Living by Choice

How often have we found that life hasn't been fair to us? We find it extremely stressful interacting and transacting with people around us. The situations and circumstances that we are left to deal with are the most difficult ones. We feel trapped in this never ending cycle of agony, and don't see a way out of this misery! With each and every new challenge that we face, we start to despise ourselves. At the same time, we try finding fault with people around us - someone on this earth is responsible for each and every issue in our life!
Our mind has been conditioned to work based on our past experiences. It is always backward/past focused, and is seldom optimistic and future friendly. It takes into account all our social and cultural upbringing factors, the situations we have had in the past - especially the negative ones. It then massages all these experiences along with our emotions and fears, to project the future - a future that rarely becomes a reality. There is a constant chatter in our head - we feel a false sense of satisfaction at simulated situations, we prepare ourselves for verbal attacks at the people who we think manipulates us. Finally, we feel frustrated that all our mental preparations were in vain, as the anticipated situation itself didn't materialize! At the end, we are totally drained out of energy, and all what we need is some rest. Instead of letting our mind wander on its own, we need to start taking back the control. It is indeed our birth-right!
Be aware of our thoughts, or in other words, Be Mindful. Whenever you catch yourself going through a never ending loop of if’s and but’s, put an immediate stop to it. If this is a reaction to an act or a word from anyone you know, just ask yourself – “So, What? Why should I get affected? I will decide my state of happiness. I will not allow anyone else to decide how I should feel”. If you are worrying about a possible negative situation about to arise in your life, take a deep breath, relax completely while you breathe out and tell yourself – “I am confident that only positive things will happen in my life. I will be able to take the best decision when the need arises. I will not worry about it now, when I don’t even know if that situation will arise”.
If we are in a situation where we feel stuck, take a deep breath and relax. Allow the supreme power to take the best possible course of action and get you the most perfect solution. Challenges in life are always learning opportunities, which help us to grow. They help us to discover our inner power, which we were never aware of till now. Few years from now, we will reflect back on this situation and appreciate how it helped us to become a stronger person. Never quit, just understand that we are facing this challenge because we have the strength and capability to overcome it. This situation will definitely pass soon.
Whenever we feel bad about ourselves, or start worrying in self-pity, just remember - "I am a perfect creation of God" - yes, even with all the imperfections that we may be aware of. And no one can look down upon us. Identify a daily routine, preferably during the start of your day, when you can get into a relaxed state of connecting with your soul / higher consciousness, and repeat the magical words – “I am Perfect”. Grab your perfect moments – as many as possible during the day. This can be part of something you do every day, so that you don’t miss it even a single day. The perfect moment for me comes when I take the sip from the glass of warm milk/coffee I drink every morning. What is yours?
Just like the physical body needing food to remain healthy, the mind also needs healthy food, in the form of positive thoughts. There are numerous Inspirational and Motivational books out there, available either online, or in the local stores. Make it a habit to have such a book with you always, as a constant companion in your daily life. Reading such books during your free time keeps the mind occupied. Books are the best way to steer your life in a particular direction.
When we use the word "I", we usually refer to our mind or our body. Do we realize that ‘I’ is not our mind? It is not even our body that we see in the mirror. ‘I’, in fact, is the Soul, which is residing in our body, and is the master of both our mind and our body. Our existence on this earth is purely for the evolution of the Soul. Let us consciously put an end to the path of sufferings, and get busy in the experiences we can gain out of life. Let us not blame ‘fate’ for every issue in our life – let us exercise our Choice!

Sunday, December 11, 2016

Learning to handle Life and its Challenges...

Life is fun every day during our school and college days, enjoying with our friends in different ways possible. But one fine day things start changing – We get into a job for our living. We get married and have children. The challenges around handling the people in our life start popping up!

The people we interact with daily in our professional life do not treat us the way we want them to. They start hurting us knowingly or unknowingly. Our Managers do not treat us fair often. Our peers try different ways to show that they are better than us. Our relationships that are to last all our life doesn’t work out as per our expectations. Our spouse is not understanding us. Our parents keep complaining on silly matters. We are struggling day and night to understand how we can satisfy the people around us, how we can change the people around, and live the life of our dreams! This was definitely not the life we were looking forward to, during our younger ages.

Below are some of the truths that we can imbibe into our essence to help us out of the misery and sufferings:
 
Truth 1: We cannot change other people or their behavior – If we are not ready to change ourselves for someone else, we surely cannot expect them to do so. So accept the fact that the other person will not change just because we want them to. Relaxing the expectations tremendously improves the peace of our mind, especially in case of our children.
 
Truth 2: We have the choice to not let other people’s behavior affect us. When someone behaves or tells us something that is meant to hurt us, imagine that we have a mirror in front of us to just deflect the remark/behavior away, before it even touches us. Once we start practicing the Imaginary Mirror technique, the hurt and suffering we have to go through because of other people’s acts, words etc will slowly start vanishing! We should never be dependent on others to define our state of happiness. The feedback from others should only be taken positively, helping us to improve ourselves.

Truth 3: The only thing we have control on, is our thoughts and our behavior – Once we learn to shield ourselves against the negativity around us, we can start changing the pattern of our thoughts to make us happier.
  • Be grateful about the countless good things and blessings in our life – List them down on a paper whenever we feel down. To make it even more challenging, don’t repeat the entries. We will be surprised that we never run out of items when we start counting our blessings. Spend time once in a while to look around and appreciate the beauty and wonder of the trees, hills, clouds, wind…
  • Whenever we feel someone is trying to let us down, understand the reason why they are doing so. Most of the time, a person’s behavior is transaction based, limited to that situation alone, and doesn’t define who the person actually is! So, be willing to forgive and forget. This takes out a lot of burden from our shoulders!
  • Respect the person who we are – When we start loving and respecting ourselves, other people will also follow. Do not live to please others, being a door-mat to others. God made us in his own image, and a part of God lives in us. I am important, so are my needs. Treat ourselves once in a while – maybe a special spa, a special gift that you have wanted for long.. and feel good about it.
  • The present moment offers us many choices, and we are free to make our choice. Prioritize and take informed decisions that we will not regret ever, any time in the future.
  • Gain control over our mind – Many a times, we will find our mind wandering in many if’s and but’s, past and future, which never materializes in reality. These thoughts only add on to our worries, and we start to solve the problems before even they arise in our life. Live in the present. Practice monitoring our thoughts on a frequent basis and redirect our mind to focus on more productive thoughts. Regular Meditation can be of additional help here. The worries we have are directly proportional to the probability of illness and diseases in our life – so let us consciously reduce them!
  • Relax and take a deep breath – Allow the good things to come to our life. Do we know that God (or the Universe or the Consciousness or whatever our belief is…) is always trying to push all the perfect things to us? We are almost always in a state of fear and resistance, that we unknowingly push all the good things away from us! Relax and open up our minds to receive!
This life is the only one we are consciously aware of. Let us live it to the fullest, be grateful for each and every blessing we already are in possession